I made a plan. I'm going to fall in love.

There's no way it would end well, but I can't find another way out.

It's not any better than other types of addictions, but it seems righter. Why? Who knows?

I felt like I was going crazy. I mean it.

Everyday I just wanted to die.

I've tried ten damn times and I can't die. That's how much of a coward I am. Serves me right.

But, I can't motivate myself to live at all.

So I'm going to be obsessed with someone! Making oneself fall in love isn't too hard, right?

I keep going out of my way to think, to analyse, to lie.

I'm just trying my best to stay alive.

It's all because I'm a fucking coward. An idiot. I can't do anything right. Not even killing myself.

I won't ask what the point of life is, but what is the point of my life?

I can't lie to myself about this, but I will have to, sometime soon. I don't have a choice.

Why me?

Why?